2: Listen with calm body language, no phones, no anxiety, be in the moment, be calm!
3: Ask Why, Where, Then What …
4: Repeat what you think they say.
5: Ask if you got it right?
6: Respond with “Im sorry, That’s hard or That’s so interesting or Thanks for Telling me!
7: NO Minimizing, Arguing or Contradicting them out of how they feel!
8: Ask if they just want you to listen, or make it better and solve together!
EMPATHY and LEARNING NEW SKILLS IS IN!
Launching into “the same thing happened to me story” before you follow all the above steps does not make your child or partner feel better. It only hurts and doesn’t help,
And yes its hard to wait to speak to speak your turn.
For more ideas and “Conversation Starters” Try Book Listen To Me Please
How to become a Behavior and Feelings Detective and 100’s of new techniques to Raise Amazing Kids